Growing up in the 50s with five other siblings was tough on me. I was very frail, small, and constantly picked on. We didn't have the most stylish clothing, so again I received a lot of teasing.
Teasing, shame, and embarrassment were confidence thieves for me.
My desire to be liked and accepted was very important. I would make every effort to come across as likable as I could in any social situation or environment. I never let any shortcomings or flaws show because that was horrible.
Living this way for half of my life was taxing not only on myself but also on those around me. Being perfect, I thought, would lessen my shame.
I had no idea that perfection did not exist, and that in my attempt to hide my flaws, I would fall back into the shame pit. Whether others noticed my blemishes or not, I was confused and frustrated.
Learning to accept me for whom God made me to be was a pivot point.
It took so many years but when I “got it,” it was amazingly freeing. I was so prideful and egotistical that I had no idea how to be real or feel authentic.
I had no idea how much I didn't know about humility. Humility is not something that comes naturally. It is something that must be developed during the maturation process.
Here are a few things that altered my perception of humility:
I can't have it unless I get honest feedback on how others perceive me.
I can acknowledge imperfection and it is okay.
I can admit and discuss my mistakes.
I accept my fallibility and flaws.
I can say less and ask more.
Humility takes vulnerability and it’s great.
It takes courage to be humble.
I do not have to be defensive.
I can safely admit when I’m wrong.
Humility draws empathy from others thus creating connection.
I find that humility can reduce anxiety and embarrassment.
This lesson of humility can be learned from others or from the hard knocks of life, as I did.
Wow! What a lesson to learn “early” in life.
Keep looking for the blind spots and building a better you.
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