Am I Right or Wise?

Growing up, being right felt like a matter of survival. When I was wrong, I felt embarrassed, even ashamed. Being right gave me a sense of safety, control, and confidence. But looking back, I can see how distorted that thinking was. There were times I was so sure of myself, yet others may have seen the truth and let me pass, not out of agreement, but out of grace.

There was a time when I would fight hard to be right, even if it cost me peace, connection, or the very relationship I wanted to protect. I believed being correct made me strong, respectable, even lovable. But over time, I’ve learned being right isn’t the same as being wise.

In many conversations, I wasn’t understanding, and I was listening to correct. I was focused on proving my point and needed to win. But in doing so, I often left the other person feeling dismissed, misunderstood, or unloved. I may have won the argument, but I lost something far more important: trust, intimacy, and emotional safety.

It takes strength to admit when I’m wrong. But it takes even more strength to let go of needing to be right when it no longer serves the relationship. Sometimes, the facts matter less than how someone feels. It’s not always about correcting their perspective; it’s about hearing their heart.

Relationships aren’t competitions. They’re partnerships. If one of us must win, then both of us lose.

Humility invites connection. It says, “I care more about us than about proving myself.” That’s where healing happens, in honesty, vulnerability, and grace.

Now, when tension arises, I ask myself: Do I want to be right, or do I want to be in the right relationship? That simple question helps me pause, soften, and choose curiosity over control.

Because at the end of the day, people won’t remember if I was right. They’ll remember how I made them feel.

And these days, when the people I love feel heard, respected, and right, I feel like I’ve truly won. I choose wisdom over being right.

Watch for the blind spots.

---

👀 Don’t wait to uncover what you don’t know you don’t know! 💡Blind Spots in Relationships, get your copy today, http://tinyurl.com/yc3usfsp