Blind Spot: Being Right
- Jerry Clark
- 8 hours ago
- 1 min read
Every family develops patterns, some healthy, some destructive, and some invisible. One of the biggest blind spots I see in families is the quiet belief that being right equals being effective. I lived this one. In the Marines, being right mattered. In construction and engineering, accuracy mattered. But in family relationships, the need to be right often becomes the greatest barrier to connection.
In counseling sessions, I remind parents and spouses that emotional maturity isn’t measured by correctness; it’s measured by connection. When a dad argues his point until his child gives up, he may win the argument but lose influence. When a spouse proves a point but shuts down the other’s feelings, they end up “dead right,” right, but alone.
Healthy families don’t chase rightness; they chase understanding. That means asking gently curious questions, listening beneath the words, and recognizing that your emotional presence matters more than your flawless logic.
Blind spots are invisible until someone holds up a mirror.
Just like the dad in my multifamily group who exploded at his son for scoring 47 on an algebra test—only to learn it was the highest score in the class. His blind spot wasn't anger; it was his automatic assumption.
When we become aware of our blind spots, we don’t lose power; we gain influence, compassion, and connection.
Watch for the blind spots.
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