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Care or Carry

Jerry Clark


I have learned so much by talking to others. A friend of mine had a heart too open for this world. From childhood, she felt the emotions of others as if they were her own. When her mother was sad, she carried her sorrow. When a friend was anxious, she lay awake at night, restless with their worries. She wasn’t just listening; she was feeling.

 

At first, her deep empathy seemed like a gift. People gravitated toward her, seeking comfort. But over time, it became a heavy burden. Crowded places overwhelmed her. The news left her emotionally drained. Even joy felt foreign because she had spent so much time carrying pain. Her relationships suffered, and she lost herself in trying to help everyone.

 

“You can care without carrying,” her girlfriend once told her. But she didn’t know how to turn it off until an older man at a café offered her a simple truth: A candle that burns at both ends disappears.

 

That moment changed everything. She realized that empathy wasn’t about drowning in others’ emotions but about witnessing them with care while keeping her heart intact.

 

Empathy is what makes us human. It strengthens relationships, improves communication, and inspires acts of kindness. However, unchecked it can lead to emotional exhaustion, blurred boundaries, and even manipulation by those who take advantage of compassionate hearts. Too much emotional empathy can lead to burnout, while cognitive empathy, understanding others without absorbing their emotions, can be a healthier balance. The key is learning to honor emotions without being consumed by them.

 

Finding balance means learning to care without carrying the weight of the world. It requires setting boundaries and recognizing that compassion does not mean sacrificing oneself. Self-compassion is as vital as compassion for others. By shifting from feeling to action, empathy becomes a force for healing rather than a burden of suffering.

 

Like my friend, I must learn that empathy is not about losing myself in the suffering of others; it’s about being present, offering support, and keeping my light strong so I can truly make a difference.

 

I choose to care, not to carry.

 

Watch for the blind spots.

 

 


"Think you’ve got it all figured out? 🤔 Your blind spots might have other plans. Dive into Blind Spots in Relationships and find out what you don’t know you don’t know. 💡 Get a copy today. 📚http://tinyurl.com/yc3usfsp

"Think you’ve got it all figured out? 🤔 Your blind spots might have other plans. Dive into Blind Spots in Relationships and find out what you don’t know you don’t know. 💡 Get a copy today. 📚http://tinyurl.com/yc3usfsp

 
 
 

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