"Courage, dear heart..."

You have a strong sense of self-worth; you know what you want and how to get it.

You are assertive enough to get people's attention, but not so aggressive that you scare them away.

Your life is going exactly as you planned, and you are truly happy—AND THEN—something completely unexpected comes at you like a ton of bricks and sends stars whirling around your head.

Someone draws your attention to a behavior that is obvious to everyone but you.

You are shocked, perplexed, and left wondering who, what, why, and where to start.

Your boss tells you that your team members are aggravated with you and that you need to change.

You are a dreamer, and someone tells you about your limiting beliefs.

And let’s be fair, blind spots are not always negative.

You may discover that you are blind to both your positive and negative characteristics.

Even those who seem to be incredibly attractive can feel inferior and unattractive.

High achievers who experience poverty as a child may believe they will never have enough money.

Children who go without food for extended periods of time may end up overspending on food and supplies as adults.

Remember that blind spots mask one's true emotions by displaying the opposite of those emotions.

Voting with your emotions rather than your beliefs, remaining in unhealthy relationships, accepting deadlines you can't meet, and supporting a group you regularly criticize are all blind spots. Eating disorders, anxiety, compulsive behaviors, depression, or other emotional and behavioral difficulties can be the result of them.

From my own experience, I know when told I was doing something wrong or out of line it was impossible to hear. I didn’t like being wrong.

Listening to grow was an unfamiliar concept.

I did not think I needed to hear perceived negative things about myself.

Why don’t they look at what I have done well?

It is easier to blame others rather than look at myself.

But when I am open to hearing about myself, I can overcome these kinds of blind spots.

Now I hear them as opportunities and ways of effectively connecting.


I now have the courage to be vulnerable. I can laugh at myself.

I saw vulnerability as an intense weakness. What a terrible misconception.

“Have courage, dear heart, for there is nothing to be afraid of and never has been.” — C.S.Lewis

This is something that has become so powerful for me and today, I am grateful for this kind of feedback. It only makes me better.


If I want to live out my life with the fewest regrets possible, I must have this kind of feedback to give me that chance.


Change requires an inordinate amount of courage.

When I change my actions and behaviors, I observe that others find it easier to start changing theirs as well.


I need to do something different so I can have the ones who are close to me in my life.

I want "close"—meaning tangible, connected, in communication with, and "participating in life" kinds of relationships.

Keep looking for the blind spots and building a better you.



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Blind Spots in Relationships

What I don't know I don't know about myself


#growthmindset #emotionalmaturity #relationshipsuccess #bettereveryday #blindspots #counselingworks #leadershipdevelopment #relationshiptips #marriageandfamilytherapy #fridayvibes #fridayfeeling #cslewis #cslewisquotes




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