Kids should be allowed to ‘go between’ parents but never allowed to ‘come between’ them.
It seems almost innate for a child to ask one parent for something and if they do not get what they want, go to the other parent.
Parents cannot be split in the decision-making process.
When parents are not in harmony, requests by the children can cause parental conflict, allowing the child to get their way while the parent's debate, argue, fight or walk away and say nothing.
In certain situations, I see children have the same authority as their parents, the authority to tell the parents what needs to happen or not happen.
There is a delicate balance between setting limits and teaching how to negotiate.
Being too lenient can create entitlement.
Being too rigid can create rebelliousness.
Be clear of the decision you have made, and do not become defensive or apologetic.
Knowing how parents will make decisions, is important for the children.
If parents don’t act as the authority, the children will.
In healthy families, parents are the pinnacle of the household.
Keep looking for the blind spots and building a better you.
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