The Space Between

Years ago, my mentor George told me, “Jerry, leaders don’t have to have the loudest voice; they need the calmest presence.” At that time, I was quick to react when things went wrong. A missed deadline, a sharp word, or a broken promise could ignite my emotions. Then I learned one of the most powerful tools of emotional intelligence: to respond, not to react.

Taking the time to think about a response does not show weakness; it’s wisdom.

It’s the space between stimulus and response where self-control lives. When I began taking three deep breaths before reacting, I discovered that calm was contagious. My words carried more influence because they weren’t fueled by anxiety or defensiveness. My relationships deepened because people felt emotionally safe around me.

I started using the same practice at home. When frustration rose, I asked myself, “What response will build connection instead of control?” That single question has saved me from a hundred unnecessary arguments.

Self-control isn’t about holding emotions hostage; it’s about guiding them with intention.

It’s choosing response over reaction, connection over control, and wisdom over impulse.

It may take a few seconds to respond, but its impact can last a lifetime. It truly is the moment that changes everything: my day, my relationships, and my leadership legacy.

Watch for the blind spots.

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Author Jerry D. Clark has faced life’s challenges and created strategies for success—he’s eager to share his insights with you! 🎯