I don’t know about you, but my mind becomes unbridled when I see or hear people say things or do things that I wouldn't. It is easy for me to be judgmental and criticize their decisions.
Just the other day, I am sitting at a long traffic light. I have set through three lights already and now I'm about to make the next one when the light turns green. I have almost been patient, waiting for my turn to go. What?! The person in front of me decides to let two cars out of a driveway?! Now I'm stuck for another lengthy light. How rude and inconsiderate? How could they? Don't they know I'm in a hurry.
It's easy to question the decisions of others especially if it gets in “my way of thinking.”
Perhaps this causes me to feel out of control. Ouch! I have a friend, wink wink, who gets upset when things like this happen, especially when he's in a hurry.
Another interesting situation is being in a long line at the grocery store and the person ahead of me is having a very engaging conversation with the checker. As they're being checked out, the story goes on and on. They are enjoying laughter, catching up, having a wonderful time together. Yeah, great for them but I'm holding only three small items and would like to get out so I can get on with my life. Then after the total comes up, the person begins to wonder how they're going to pay for it. Should I use cash or a card? When they finally decide, it takes forever to get the means of payment out and during that process their conversation continues. Wow! Do these people not have any empathy at all?
What an interesting thought. Surely, I'm not the only one that's ever felt this way.
What about the clothes some wear? Have you ever said to yourself or to another you wouldn't be caught dead wearing those clothes? Perhaps you or someone you know has said, “Her clothes are for teenagers not for the elderly.”
These kinds of situations are endless. Oh, if you knew all the things I say to myself. Isn’t it fascinating how different we are and how easy it is to think others should think or do what we would do.
What if I just looked at these situations as fascinating and not judgmentally? What if I looked at these situations as, “I'm not in control of what others think and do.”
Blind Spot: others don’t think like me; rather than trying to control or be upset, it would be best if I sought self-control. Perhaps my life would be less negative, chaotic, and out of control.
What about you? Can you relate to my situation? What will it take to disallow these experiences in life to dominate your thoughts and feelings?
I am a work in progress, how about you?
Watch for the blind spots.
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You can get a copy of my book below.
Blind Spots in Relationships
What I don't know I don't know about Myself
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