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Have you ever noticed that, at times, people will make a comment to us that doesn’t fit at all? It is easy for someone to blame us for things we didn't do or think about. Sometimes, a person making false accusations with no merit is just projecting onto us. The projection here refers to the psychological phenomenon where an individual ascribes their thoughts, feelings, or characteristics to another person. It involves attributing one's desires, fears, or beliefs to someone else, often without considering whether those attributes are accurate or present in the other person. This is frustrating at best because it is not easy to prove or convince someone that their claim is false. It can often seem impossible, and the repercussions can be disastrous. Projection can occur in various ways within relationships. Look at these examples: If an individual feels angry or insecure, they may accuse their partner of being angry or unfaithful without any evidence. A person with low self-esteem may project their negative self-image onto their partner, believing that they are too good for them or that they will eventually leave. If someone has been hurt or betrayed in the past, they may project their fears of being hurt again onto their current partner, even if there is no evidence to suggest that their partner would engage in similar behavior. Projection has a significant impact on relationships and can lead to misunderstandings, conflicts, and a lack of trust between partners. Individuals need to become aware of their projections and engage in self-reflection to differentiate between their thoughts, feelings, and experiences and those of their partner. Acting in this manner is the pinnacle of emotionally mature behavior. Addressing and resolving projection-related difficulties requires open and honest communication, empathy, and self-awareness. Wow! It is a prevalent behavior and such a BIG blind spot. Are you familiar with this concept? It is difficult to recognize projections coming from ourselves. Watch for the blind spots. Please like, share or comment. I appreciate your feedback. If you would like to learn more about exposing blind spots grab your copy of the book below. Blind Spots in Relationships What I don't know I don't know about Myself #friday #fridayvibes #fridaymotivation #InsecurityKills #insecurity #Shame #blame #blamegame #blindspots #counselingworks #mindsetmatters #bettereveryday #mindset #bayharbourumc #bekind #growthmindset #emotionalmaturity #counseling #growtogether #mindsetiseverything #marriagecoach #relationshiprevolution #relationshipcoach #relationships #relationshiptips #networkingdonedifferent #businesscoaching

My friend Ralph was talking to his mentor George. Ralph always seemed to be recovering from his errors and mistakes, spending more time cleaning them up than creating opportunities. George inquired about his golfing experience, which included standing on the tee box and looking towards the green with a lake in between. “What do you focus on here? Is it the lake or the green?”, he said. Ralph said he usually got out an old ball in case it went into the water. George then asked if that was playing offense or defense. "Ugh," Ralph replied, "when will I get it?" George went on to discuss previous talks to remind Ralph that life works far better when we play offensive rather than defense or recovery. You can simply wait for the expected, important occasions in your relationships, such as birthdays, anniversaries, Valentine's Day, and so on but this is playing defense on your heels. Let’s play offense! How about organizing and planning something super special as a surprise out of the blue? How about coming home with a big, beautiful bouquet on a regular Tuesday night, or coming home and slipping an unexpected, wrapped gift into her closet or leaving it next to her morning coffee cup, or how about buying one of those expensive hallmark cards and writing a love note in it when it is not a holiday? How about cooking a surprise candlelit dinner for just the two of you? See, that's attacking the goal. If you only play defense, you get a few points. But to score, you must play offense. Then George asked about Ralph's parenting. It is easy to praise when your child does something extraordinary, a drawing they're proud of, a dive in the pool they've been working on, a sound report card, or they win the game. When you give them kudos and praise for these things, that is still playing defense. You are merely responding to a shot they fired, not attacking, or acting. The offense would be praising them when they made good choices without being asked or reminded. Typically, you pay greater attention to good behavior that follows a bad choice or behavior. The poor decision or behavior drew your notice and compelled you to act, which is still defense. But when you catch them being polite, sweet, thoughtful, considerate, funny, or behaving in other ways that you love on their own, without prompting, give those little moments some offensive action. Take shots at that goal, point them out, praise them, and let them know that what you shine a light on grows. How about you? Have you been playing more defense than offense? Watch for the blind spots. Thanks for liking, commenting and sharing this post. Your feedback is priceless. If you would like to learn more about exposing blind spots, grab a copy of the book. Blind Spots in Relationships What I don't know I don't know about Myself #wednesday #wednesdaymotivation #wednesdaymood #blindspots #counselingworks #mindsetmatters #bettereveryday #mindset #bayharbourumc #bekind #growthmindset #emotionalmaturity #counseling #growtogether #mindsetiseverything #marriagecoach #relationships #relationshiprevolution #relationshipcoach #relationships #relationshiptips #networkingdonedifferent #businesscoaching

Today is Memorial Day. Last week I mentioned that freedom isn't free. We are privileged to have a memorable holiday; let us remember the fallen on this fine day. Let us remember not only the ones who gave it all but their families and friends who also suffer the pain of their lost loved ones. I remember Robert Borton and A.J. Darling. Both were with me. Robert was out on a listening post and never returned. He is listed as missing in action and possibly a Prisoner of War. His remains have not been found. A.J. took my place during an operation and didn't make it back. I swore I would contact their families when I came home. I was so busy trying to fit back into civilization and made every excuse not to contact them. I feared it would have been more difficult for them and me. Now I see what a gift I had to share about their sons with each family. This is not something I am proud of. Many years ago, I found their names on the internet. I saw their anguish was awful. So much needed to be known about their losses. There were too many unanswered questions for them. (My Blind Spot) It is not easy to admit my neglect. I will pay tribute to them today. Robert, A.J., and their families. What a tragedy. Mr. and Mrs. Borton, Mr. and Mrs. Darling, please accept my apologies for being ill-equipped to do the right thing. I know you are in heaven with Robert and A.J. I will not forget you. This is a day of picnics, BBQs, the beginning of summer, and many other opportunities for fun and relaxation. As we enjoy the day, let us all be aware that freedom isn't free. Watch for the blind spots. Please like, share or comment. I appreciate your feedback. If you would like to learn more about exposing blind spots grab your copy of the book below. Blind Spots in Relationships What I don't know I don't know about Myself #counselingworks #mindsetmatters #bettereveryday #communication #communicationiskey #marriage #goals #goals2023 #goalsandprocess #process #selfempowerment #fridayinspiration #changeyourmindset #memorialday2023 #MemorialDay #memorialdayweekend2023 #changeyourlife #mindset #empoweryourself #bayharbourumc #growthmindset #mondaymotivation #monday #mondaymorning #mondaymood #leadershipcoaching #buildabetteryou

Parades, picnics, store sales, musical performances, speeches, and a holiday from work are ways we celebrate Memorial Day. Our church honors Memorial Day by placing crosses and flags in front of the church to honor those who fell while serving our country. It is a day of celebration for some and remembrance for others. It began after the civil war and was called Remembrance Day to honor those fallen in that terrible war. In 1971, it was changed to Memorial Day. Taps played by Americo Zapata a Junior at Arizona State University I like to look deeper into this day. The ones who lost their lives, who gave it all, are to be held in the highest honor. With every death, there is collateral damage, it is the collateral damage of pain and grief. Each death represents a grieving mother, father, spouse, children, and relatives. I call this the center circle. The next circle the middle circle, is relatives and close friends. Then, the outer circle of grieving persons involves coworkers, other distant relatives, and neighbors. All are grief-stricken during the first period. The ones in the outer circle begin to move on with their daily lives, and their grief begins to fade. The ones in the middle circle have a more difficult time letting go, and the suffering remains longer. The ones in the center circle have a much tougher time letting go and understandably so, their grief is like a lead blanket. Within this circle, I see the last to let go are their mom and dad and spouses. The last from that group I see is usually the mom. She seems to hold on to anything she can to remind her of her loss—a shirt or a jacket hanging in the closet and all the pictures, which are never enough. When the mom speaks of her loss, her voice reverberates with pain and reverence of her hollow soul. Freedom isn't free. [Blind Spot] This holiday does not include those wounded and who carry the pain and reminder of their sacrifice. Some have family caregivers who also continue to suffer. The U.S. flag is traditionally raised to the staff's peak and solemnly lowered to half-staff until noon on Memorial Day. Afterward, it is raised to full staff as a symbol of the living's determination to avoid the sacrifices being in vain. Freedom isn't free. [Blind Spot] I hope you remember as you enjoy our country's freedom, that there are some have paid the ultimate price, and some continue to pay the price for freedom. And as you celebrate, stop and remember who has and continues to sacrifice for our beautiful country. I hope you enjoy the sales, have great picnics and outings, and have time off for relaxation, fun and joy. Watch for the blind spots. Please like, share or comment. I appreciate your feedback. If you would like to learn more about exposing blind spots grab your copy of the book below. Blind Spots in Relationships What I don't know I don't know about Myself

Emotionally mature people can tell the difference between constructive and destructive feedback. Constructive feedback helps us identify blind spots. Destructive feedback comes across as controlling and belittling. Too many people are saying, “You need to do it this way, you shouldn’t do that. Well, that didn’t work well. You definitely should have studied harder.” What we hear is we are not enough; we don’t measure up to their standards. Then we feel bad because it’s difficult to live up to the way others measure. Comparison…that’s another measure, it’s looking at people and thinking, “Man, everyone has better ideas, are making more, getting out there more, selling more, doing more.” It can be easy to feel like everyone else is just…more. Using someone else’s yardstick to measure your self-worth will always leave you short. We all have our own talents, strengths, skills, and abilities and we should never measure or compare ourselves against another. We can only measure ourselves against our own potential and against the person we were the day before. When it comes to your potential, it’s important to recognize the things you enjoy, excel, and have a bent toward. Then tap into those things. Let’s follow the big play book and “pay careful attention to your own work, for then you will get the satisfaction of a job well done, and you won’t need to compare (measure) yourself to anyone else. For we are each responsible for our own conduct.” ~Galatians 6:4-5 NLT Keep your yardstick close. Watch for the blind spots and build a better you. Please share, like or comment on this post. I appreciate your feedback. If you would like to know more about discovering your blind spots, grab a copy of the book below. Blind Spots in Relationships What I don't know I don't know about myself #wednesday #wednesdaymotivation #wednesdaymood #blindspots #counselingworks #mindsetmatters #bettereveryday #mindset #bayharbourumc #bekind #growthmindset #emotionalmaturity #counseling #growtogether #mindsetiseverything #marriagecoach #relationships #relationshiprevolution #relationshipcoach #relationships #relationshiptips #dothingsright #networkingdonedifferent #businesscoaching #relationalintelligence #limitingbelief #comparisonisthethiefofjoy #comparison #galatians

This past Sunday was another wonderful experience watching the young family that usually sits in front of us at church. I am amazed at what I see happen as this young couple comes to celebrate Sunday with their three children. Their ages are 3,7, and 9. The love in this family is so apparent, and the children's behavior is exemplary. The mom sat with her arm around her daughter. Both leaned in, demonstrating a firm, loving grip. Her son looked over at them, leaned into her, and was received by her other loving arm and gentle caress. Love, comfort, connection, and security were all spoken without words. Her younger son was sitting comfortably in Dad's lap, and when he waved at her with his pinkie finger, she returned it and added a loving smile. Dad glanced at the middle child and, with a wink and a nod to the front, the boy paid quick attention to what was happening. After the children's sermon, they left for their activities and the parents scooted close and embraced. Wow, what a fantastic conversation they had with no words. Have you ever noticed how we pick up information from others without hearing a sound? Our body language radiates a range of emotions, intentions, and attitudes. They include gestures, posture, facial expressions, eye contact, and touch. Tone, including pitch, volume, and rhythm, comes from within the body and can convey emotions and attitudes. A gentle and soothing tone can express care and empathy, while a harsh or condescending tone may indicate anger or criticism. Touch is a powerful nonverbal form of communication in relationships. It can convey affection, comfort, support, and connection. Different types of touch, such as a gentle caress, a firm handshake, or a comforting hug, can communicate various emotions and intentions. However, because individual preferences might vary, it's important to respect personal boundaries and get permission before touching someone. Eye contact is a significant aspect of nonverbal communication, conveying attentiveness, interest, and sincerity. Maintaining appropriate and comfortable eye contact during conversations demonstrates active listening and engagement. On the other hand, prolonged or excessive eye contact could be viewed in some situations as intrusive or uncomfortable. Silence and pauses convey various meanings, such as reflection, discomfort, or tension. Comfortable silence can indicate a sense of closeness. Open and honest communication, both verbal and nonverbal, are crucial for building and maintaining healthy and fulfilling relationships. Awareness of and responsiveness to nonverbal communication can deepen understanding, enhance emotional connection, and improve overall relationship dynamics. Do you ever take into consideration what your body is saying? What are your unconscious body mannerisms saying to others? Watch for the blind spots. Please comment, like, and share, I appreciate your input. Get a copy of my book below. Blind Spots in Relationships What I don't know I don't know about Myself #mondaymotivation #mondaymood #mondaymorning #mondaythoughts #blindspots #counselingworks #mindsetmatters #bettereveryday #mindset #bayharbourumc #growthmindset #emotionalmaturity #counseling #mindsetiseverything #marriagecoach #mentalhealth #relationships #relationshipcoach #therapy #silence #words #wordsmatter #emotions #emotionsmatter #bodylanguage #withoutwords #eyecontact #nonverbalcommunication #networkingdonedifferent

At the end of last year, I talked about setting goals for the upcoming year. Remember, I asked you to write a letter to be read at year-end that reflects the goals and accomplishments you attained this year, 2023. "How will it end?" was the title.The letter was to be written as though the year was complete and you were summarizing your successes. Now is a great time to dig it out and see where you stand. Oops, are you like most who did not get around to it? Well, that's what happens when we set something out into the future and don't feel the pressure initially. [Blind Spot] I think this is a great time to examine the relationship between goals and processes. Goals and processes are two interrelated aspects of achieving success, but they serve different purposes and play different roles in the overall journey. Let's explore each of them: Goals are specific targets or objectives that you set to accomplish within a particular time-frame. They provide direction and a clear sense of purpose. Goals help you define what you want to achieve and act as a roadmap for your actions. They can be short-term or long-term, and they should be specific, measurable, attainable, relevant, and time-bound (SMART). Goals provide a sense of focus and motivation, helping you stay on track and measure your progress. Process refers to the steps, actions, and strategies you undertake to achieve your goals. It is the method or approach you follow to reach your desired outcomes. The process involves the day-to-day activities, tasks, and routines necessary to achieve your goals. It includes planning, organizing, executing, monitoring, and adjusting your actions as needed. While goals provide the destination, the process is the journey that leads you there. In the post mentioned above, there is a super resource for establishing this principle, it’s called the Weekly Display and you can download it by clicking this link Weekly Display. This form provides the daily tracking process to ensure goals are met. Goals are essential methods of guiding our lives to success. They are easy to set, appear impressive, and ensure prosperity, at least initially. If we are not diligent, they can become an albatross around our necks if we allow time to outrun our progress. Processes encompass the actions, strategies, and time-frames to achieve those goals. Both are essential components of success and finding a balance between the two is crucial for sustainable progress and personal fulfillment. How are you doing on your annual goals? Are they still attainable? How important were they when you established them? It is not too late. Watch for the blind spots. Please comment, like, and share, I appreciate your input. Get a copy of my book below. Blind Spots in Relationships What I don't know I don't know about Myself #counselingworks #mindsetmatters #bettereveryday #communication #communicationiskey #marriage #goals #goals2023 #goalsandprocess #process #selfempowerment #fridayinspiration #changeyourmindset #networkingdonedifferent #changeyourlife #mindset #thinking #mindovermatter #empoweryourself #bayharbourumc #growthmindset #emotionalmaturity #resetyourmind #Friday #fridayvibes #fridaymotivation #leadershipcoaching #buildabetteryou

So, the year was 2022, and it was January. My book, Blind Spots in Relationships, What I Don't Know I Don't Know About, Myself, was released. This is a self-published book through Amazon and sales immediately began to rise. I was excited and enthusiastic about getting the word out in order to alleviate the emotional pain, financial burden, and fear that children experience when their family unit is destroyed. I have also seen too many careers jeopardized as a result of poor relationships. More important than selling books, I wanted the message to get out so that individuals might recognize and develop new relationship opportunities—couples, parent-child, business relationships, extended families, and so on. I set out to speak to civic clubs, podcasts, churches, schools, and other places to spread the word. WHAT! Just because you publish a book doesn't mean the world is out there to buy it. This being my first adventure of writing my book, was like setting out on a journey, not knowing where I was going or how I was going to get there. I have had to laugh many times and the things that I have been able to learn over the past 1 1/2 years. Trilogy Christian Publishing released my book early in 2023. Being an International Christian publishing company, this was the booster rocket that would propel this movement over the top. [Blind Spot] WHAT! Again, even though a publishing company is marketing this book, sales still didn't go over the top. I was talking to a friend who has recently retired from an aerospace company and is forming a new business independently. He said it had taken years for his new business to take off, but now it seems to be flourishing. His statement was, "You have to play in a lot of dive bars before hitting the big time." (He is also a musician) This truly resonated with me. Not that we are playing in any dive bars, but the concept was powerful. Kel Majors is doing the graphics and marketing for my book. Her work has been tireless and highly effective as she illustrates these posts and provides research and organization for our future. We have launched this book and these posts on a wing and many prayers with the idea that God will accomplish His purpose as He has told me to get this message to the masses. Our job is to be faithful and continue the process as we are guided. How about you? Have you ventured into the unknown, on a wing, and prayed with the idea that God’s got this? It is indeed an adventure. Live boldly! We only get one time around in this life. What is God inspiring you to do? Are you allowing your limiting beliefs to thwart your progress? [Blind Spot] Are you playing in enough dive bars? Watch for the blind spots. Please comment, like, and share, I appreciate your input. You can get a copy of my book below. Blind Spots in Relationships What I don't know I don't know about Myself #wednesday #wednesdaymotivation #wednesdaymood #blindspots #counselingworks #mindsetmatters #bettereveryday #mindset #bayharbourumc #bekind #growthmindset #emotionalmaturity #counseling #growtogether #mindsetiseverything #marriagecoach #relationships #relationshiprevolution #divebar #experience #experiencematters #relationshipcoach #relationships #relationshiptips #dothingsright #NetworkingDoneDifferent #businesscoaching #relational #limitingbelief

Happy belated Mother’s Day to all mothers! It is never too late. I heard this a couple of days ago. I am still determining the validity of this story, but I love it anyway. One day young Thomas Edison came home from school with a sealed note from his teacher. He was instructed only to give it to his mother and do it as soon as he entered the house. He found his mother and did as he was requested. His mother opened the envelope and began reading. Her eyes started to fill with tears as she read the letter. Young Thomas hesitantly asked what it said. His mother wiped her eyes, looked proudly at her son, and said, "It says, 'Your son is a genius, and this school is too small for him and doesn't have enough good teachers to train him properly. Please teach him yourself.'" Edison, as you know, became one of the greatest inventors in history. Many years later, after his mother had passed, he was going through an old closet in his family home, and in it, he found the old envelope that contained the letter that he had given to his mother so many years ago. He opened the envelope and pulled out the letter. The note said, “Your son is mentally ill, and we cannot let him attend our school anymore. He is expelled.” Edison became emotional while reading it, and later that evening, he wrote in his diary; Thomas Edison was a mentally ill child whose mother turned him into a genius. That is the magical power of a mother's love. A mother's belief can turn what could have been a delinquent into a genius, a creator, a contributor, a person who ends up having a profound impact on the life of billions of people. All of this occurred by the power of love and belief. Mothers have a magical ability to instill confidence in us. Though we can believe we are ordinary, mothers are the ones who show us how extraordinary we actually are. The longer I live, the more I appreciate mothers. They work tirelessly and without us having a clue, sacrifice and give up things for themselves so we, as their children, don't go without. I love my mom and miss her dearly. I hope your moms were recognized for all they did for you without you even knowing it. It is never too late. Watch for the blind spots. Please comment, like, and share, I appreciate your input. Get a copy of my book below. Blind Spots in Relationships What I don't know I don't know about Myself #mondaymotivation #mondaymood #mondaymorning #mondaythoughts #blindspots #counselingworks #mindsetmatters #Mothersday2023 #mothersday #mothersdaybrunch #mother #bettereveryday #mindset #bayharbourumc #growthmindset #emotionalmaturity #counseling #empathymatters #mindsetiseverything #marriagecoach #mentalhealth #relationships #relationshipcoach #therapy

Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, and forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you. Ephesians 4:32 God’s grace is free and abundant. We pay no price, nor can we earn it. It is freely given. Grace in relationships refers to extending kindness, forgiveness, and understanding to others, even when they may not deserve it. It involves approaching interactions with empathy and compassion and striving to maintain a positive and respectful demeanor, even in the face of conflict or disagreement. My friends Ralph and Robin are as human as they come. They practice great things and suffer from their own mistakes, as we all do. Both have been hurt by the other’s mistakes, choices, and failures. The beauty of their relationship is they are still extremely gracious to each other. Just as God’s grace is unearned, Ralph and Robin apply this in their relationship. It is impressive when one shows the other grace, how the other wants to step up and show their love and appreciation in return. It has been my experience that the more couples lean on God, the more solid and healthy their relationship becomes. When practicing grace in relationships, we strive to avoid judgment and criticism and instead aim to listen and understand the perspectives of others. We are willing to acknowledge our own faults and shortcomings and work to make amends when necessary. Grace in relationships can profoundly impact the quality of our connections with others. It can help foster trust, deepen emotional intimacy, and create a sense of mutual respect and admiration. It can also facilitate healthy conflict resolution and promote forgiveness and healing in times of strife. Ultimately, practicing grace in relationships requires a willingness to prioritize the well-being of others and to approach interactions with kindness, compassion, and understanding. By doing so, we cultivate deeper, more meaningful connections with those around us and contribute to a more harmonious and peaceful relationship. How are you showing grace? I know it is something I can continue to work on. How about you? Watch for the blind spots. Please comment, like, and share, I appreciate your input. Get a copy of my book below. Blind Spots in Relationships What I don't know I don't know about Myself #counselingworks #mindsetmatters #bettereveryday #communication #communicationiskey #marriage #selfempowerment #fridayinspiration #changeyourmindset #changeyourlife #mindset #thinking #Grace #graceupongrace #GraceofGod #mindovermatter #kindness #empoweryourself #bayharbourumc #growthmindset #emotionalmaturity #resetyourmind #Friday #fridayvibes #fridaymotivation #leadershipcoaching #buildabetteryou

My friends Ralph and Robin have been hurt and in pain for the last 2 to 4 years. They have very young and challenging children, and most of their focus and attention at home involves raising them. Young children have many needs and wants. Appeasing them can be intrusive to a marriage. The emphasis shifts to the children, and the pursuit of their marital connection takes a back seat after some time. It is a slow and deadly erosion, and because of this, their relationship grows cold. Together they sought an outsider's view of their circumstances. They knew that letting go of relational pain would be challenging but essential in moving forward and finding healing. They looked for sage advice and support. Having someone to listen, initiate new strategies, and provide comfort and encouragement was difficult but helpful to hear. They began to focus on the following: They started to express and feel the emotions connected to the suffering, such as differing parenting methods, feeling unpursued, despair, or disappointment, in a healthy way rather than trying to hide or reject their feelings. This was done by talking about themselves and not the other. "I'm frustrated; I'm confused; I'm hurt; I do not feel pursued." Acknowledging rather than holding or stuffing pain can provide necessary relief. Initiating self-care by attending to themselves physically, emotionally, and spiritually. This includes getting enough sleep, eating nutritious food, exercising, practicing prayer, mindfulness, and meditation. Practicing forgiveness. This is not about condoning the other person's behavior but rather about releasing themselves from the anger and resentment they were holding. This involves writing a letter to the person or simply letting go of the negative emotions associated with the relationship. Focusing on the present and refusing to dwell on the past or worry about the future. Instead, focus on the present moment and the things they can control. Remember, letting go of relational pain is a process that will take time. Be patient with yourself and continue to take steps toward healing and growth. Are you now, or have you in the past experienced this Ralph and Robin story? There is still time to go back and implement the items listed above. Watch for the blind spots. Please comment, like, and share, I appreciate your input. You can get a copy of my book below. Blind Spots in Relationships What I don't know I don't know about Myself #wednesday #wednesdaymotivation #wednesdaymood #blindspots #counselingworks #mindsetmatters #bettereveryday #mindset #bayharbourumc #bekind #growthmindset #emotionalmaturity #counseling #growtogether #mindsetiseverything #marriagecoach #relationships #relationshiprevolution #russelltomlinson #relationshipcoach #relationships #relationshiptips #dothingsright #NetworkingDoneDifferent #businesscoaching #relational

Empathy is a critical component of healthy and fulfilling relationships. It involves the ability to understand and share another person's feelings, which can help build trust, intimacy, and emotional connection. It is like being in their skin, thoroughly allowing and appreciating their experiences. We are so different and sometimes feel that everyone sees and processes experiences just as we do. [Blind Spot] Being in another's shoes is not enough. Empathy is not sympathy. Sympathy is the formal expression of pity or sorrow for someone else's misfortune. In relationships, empathy can help partners feel seen, heard, and understood. When someone is going through a difficult time, expressing empathy can provide comfort and support, strengthening the bond between partners. Similarly, when someone is happy or excited, sharing their joy through empathetic listening and conversation can help them feel valued and appreciated. "You never really understand a person until you consider things from his point of view, until you climb inside of his skin and walk around in it." ~ Harper Lee, To Kill a Mockingbird Empathy requires effort and attention. It involves actively listening and tuning in to body language and nonverbal cues. It bears repeating; empathy is putting oneself in another person's skin to understand their perspective. Sometimes, it can be difficult to empathize with a partner's emotions, especially if they are feeling upset or angry. In these situations, it's essential to remain calm, patient, and nonjudgmental to create a safe and supportive space for them to share their feelings. Using gently curious questions and not fixing them is also helpful. Overall, empathy is a vital component of healthy relationships. By cultivating empathy, partners create a more profound sense of emotional intimacy and connection, which help them navigate the challenges and joys of life together. Want to improve your relational connection? On an empathy scale of 1 to 10, give yourself a rating. Regardless of what rating you gave, what can you do to move the rating up just half a point? Healthy relationships take work. Are you coasting? Watch for the blind spots. Feel free to comment, like, and share these posts. You can get a your book below. Blind Spots in Relationships What I don't know I don't know about myself #mondaymotivation #mondaymood #mondaymorning #mondaythoughts #blindspots #counselingworks #mindsetmatters #bettereveryday #mindset #bayharbourumc #empathy #growthmindset #emotionalmaturity #counseling #empathymatters #mindsetiseverything #marriagecoach #mentalhealth #relationships #relationshiprevolution #russelltomlinson #relationshipcoach #therapy