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Yesterday was Mother's Day. Wow, she raised six of us, each about two years apart. From when the oldest was born to when the youngest graduated, she spent nearly 30 years actively parenting. Although she was a stay-at-home mom initially, she worked for the majority of those years and afterwards. She devoted herself tirelessly, giving everything she could. She rarely complained while managing a restaurant all those years and spending most of her long days on her feet. Her selflessness was indeed a sacrifice. Although our family wasn't religious, Mom quietly and respectfully ensured we knew about Jesus, providing us with that foundational belief. Thank you, mom. I remember the night she passed away. I was on a business trip in central Texas. That evening, we dined at a charming little restaurant. The waitress there reminded me so much of mom. She hustled around, balancing more plates than seemed feasible, serving everyone efficiently while remaining engaged. As I admired her flow while working so diligently, I did not know Mom had passed. Looking back, it felt as though my mom had appeared to say goodbye, assuring me she would always be with me. It was an emotional yet beautiful dinner. Today, I reflect on how mom was tirelessly hardworking, selfless, dedicated, and loved each of us equally. She weathered our mistakes, shortcomings, and the moments we let her down. Yet, despite her high expectations for us, she was always quick to forgive. Mom was the unsung hero of our lives. She was our first teacher, our confidante, and our staunchest supporter. She expected much from us, and it was all for the better. Her influence profoundly shaped who we are.  Mom had an incredible capacity to nurture and heal. Whether mending a broken toy or a broken heart, Mom had a gentle, healing touch that made everything feel better.  During the hard times, she was there with reassurance, saying, "It will be okay." Those words continue to ring in my mind. I love you, Mom, miss you terribly, and will always be grateful for your influence on my life. How about you? Is there something you need to tell your mom before it's too late? Watch for the blind spots. Thank you for your feedback, please like, share and comment. I appreciate it. Get a copy of Blind Spots in Relationships. Discover the hidden behavior that could be holding you back from the relationships you desire. http://tinyurl.com/yc3usfsp

My voice is not merely a tool for speaking; it's a powerful instrument of influence and leadership at home and in the workplace. Using my voice can inspire trust and respect or foster discord and dissatisfaction. Whether I know it or not, my voice does go with them. At home, my communication style significantly shapes the emotional climate of our family. As a pivotal figure in the household, how I use my voice to guide, support and affirm plays a crucial role in strengthening our bonds and fostering a nurturing environment. My words can empower my family members, aiding their development into confident and resilient individuals. It's important to reflect on whether my communication is clear and consistent, calm, and supportive, or if it sometimes carries undertones of negativity, control, or harshness. In the workplace, the tone of my voice profoundly impacts my team's culture and overall morale. As a leader, the way I communicate can either build confidence and drive productivity or create chaos and dissent. By using my voice positively and clearly, I lead by example, creating a collaborative and creative environment. Conversely, negative communication can lead to confusion and undermine team cohesion. I need to harness the power of my voice to foster a sense of unity and shared purpose among team members. The voice that 'goes with' our family members or colleagues can be a beacon of encouragement or a shadow of negativity. In both settings, the power of my voice lies in its ability to affect change and drive positive outcomes. When I am fully aware that my voice will go with you, I feel responsible for giving my best. How about you? As you send your voice to others, what do they take away? Watch for the blind spots. Thanks for your feedback, please like, share and comment. Get a copy of Blind Spots in Relationships. Discover the hidden behavior that could be holding you back from the relationships you desire. http://tinyurl.com/yc3usfsp

Too often, I find myself in an awkward situation where I need to make quick decisions. After I began my career as a therapist, I had an office in Lake Jackson, TX. One morning, I was talking to a couple. They were talking about their circumstances, which was very difficult for them. I found myself jumping past the story's teller and began to offer opportunities for resolution. After demonstrating my expertise, I heard the end of their story, which changed my perspective on the problem and solution. [Blind spot] Had I fully listened to their story, they would have felt, heard, and appreciated rather than interrupted and devalued; I would have talked about something entirely different. How embarrassing. Any time I make a mistake like that, I want to take it back. How would I do it if I could go back and do this differently? This question creates a learning opportunity for me. When I experience this kind of situation or see another make this blunder, I ask, "If I could go back and do this again, "do-over," how would I do it differently? It will not help me in the current situation, but I can process it as a learning opportunity because situations and events reappear. I get out my 3 X 5 note cards to overcome these embarrassing situations or conversations. At the top of each card, I write what someone might say or do and how I would respond underneath. I get another card and do the same. I write as many cards as I can on the subject. This prevents me from ambush or surprise comments and allows me to prepare for the future and make informed choices next time. It reinforces my ability to learn from mistakes and adapt, increasing my self-assurance for future endeavors. Each do-over is a chance to refine my skills, develop as a person, and enhance my readiness for whatever comes next. How about you? Can you learn from your mistakes by processing a "do-over”? Watch for the blind spots. I appreciate your thoughts and comments. Please like and share. Thanks. Get a copy of Blind Spots in Relationships. You will discover the hidden behavior that could be holding you back from the relationships you desire. http://tinyurl.com/yc3usfsp

For the longest time, I was unaware that pride was a blind spot for me, intricately linked with my ego and emotional survival. Dominated by my need to be right and in control, my thinking was driven by a compulsion to demonstrate my expertise.  Little did I recognize that others around me feel wrong when I'm right and others feel controlled when I'm in control. Wow, I don't like to feel wrong or controlled. [Blind spot] Yet I put others in that experience. Pride is that emotion associated with a heightened sense of self-esteem and satisfaction derived from my accomplishments or the accomplishments of those I am closely connected to. Pride has many meanings. I can be proud of my family, team, or achievements. However, when pride causes me to appear arrogant, haughty, elite, or holier than thou, it becomes a significant problem. It was natural for me to compare myself to others and boast about my accomplishments. Little did I recognize the impact it had on myself and others. Today, I focus on humility, a personal quality characterized by a lack of arrogance or an absence of ego. It involves recognizing and accepting my limitations and imperfections while also valuing the worth and contributions of others. Unlike pride, which often focuses on my self-celebration and sometimes self-importance, humility is more about maintaining a realistic perspective of my importance in relation to the broader aspects of life. Humility involves an accurate and occasionally sober self-assessment, acknowledging strengths and weaknesses without undue emphasis on either. While humility may include recognizing one's limitations, it doesn't mean a lack of confidence. Instead, humble people possess a quiet confidence that doesn't need to be loudly proclaimed; they are secure in their values and capabilities without being boastful. Being humble also means being open to new ideas, feedback, and possibly making mistakes. Humility allows me to be teachable, adaptable, and flexible. Better yet, it helps me to laugh at myself. How about you? Can you replace some pride with humility? Watch for the blind spots. Thanks for your feedback. Please like, share and comment. Get a copy of Blind Spots in Relationships. Discover the hidden behavior that could be holding you back from the relationships you desire. http://tinyurl.com/yc3usfsp

I see others make poor choices, act terribly, and do things I would never do. Strangely enough, I find myself being critical of them. Indeed, actions that violate the law or victimize others are wrong, yet I think everyone should think like me. I sometimes ask why they are doing this, acting this way, saying those things, etc. [Blind Spot] I see politicians developing the most ineffective, inefficient ways to spend money. I see protesters who are destroying buildings and assaulting police officers who are not the enemy but everyday citizens who have willingly taken on the responsibility of ensuring our safety. So, I ask myself, “What is wrong with all these crazy decisions and choices?” It’s fascinating how we perceive our perspective as the standard for rationality and reason. I believe that my thoughts, beliefs, and opinions are not only valid but also superior to those of others. [Blind Spot] This inclination towards believing everyone should think like me is not uncommon; it’s a natural consequence of our unique experiences, upbringing, and personal biases. It’s as if my mind is wired to seek validation and affirmation of my beliefs, leading me to believe that if everyone thought the way I do, the world would be a better place. Imagine if everyone shared the same thoughts, opinions, and ideas—society would stagnate, innovation would cease, and progress would halt. The clash of differing viewpoints fuels creativity, drives innovation, and propels humanity forward. Moreover, insisting that others think like me undermines the fundamental principles of autonomy and individuality. How about you? Do you think everyone should think the same as you think? Watch for the blind spots. Thank you for your feedback. Please like, share and comment. Get a copy of Blind Spots in Relationships. Discover the hidden behavior that could be holding you back from the relationships you desire. http://tinyurl.com/yc3usfsp

A couple of Sundays ago, I sat in church behind a family that revealed a sermon all their own. There was a mom, a dad, two young boys, and a daughter who looked like the oldest child. As the church service went on, I noticed the mom gently stroking her daughter’s shoulder without even thinking about it. It was a slight touch, but it said so much to me. It showed love, care, and comfort, all without saying a word. From the daughter’s point of view, this simple touch appeared very comforting. It seemed to have made her daughter feel safe and supported, almost like her mom was whispering, “I’m here for you,” or “You’re safe with me.” I think of this as the language of touch—a way of communicating that we often don’t pay much attention to. During the quiet, thoughtful parts of the service, this touch helped strengthen their bond, reminding the daughter of their close connection and the peace they find together in their community of faith. This soft touch told me a lot about mom. It showed that she cares and knows what her touch means to her daughter. This gesture shows she’s a protective and caring mom, ensuring her daughter feels loved and supported, especially in church. The way the mom touched her daughter also shows her empathy—her ability to understand and share her feelings with another. It’s a way for her to show comfort and reassurance, quietly demonstrating her deep, natural connection with her daughter. The mom also instilled important values such as unity, support for one another, and commitment to their faith, emphasizing their shared lives. This mom’s touch helped build not just an emotional but also a spiritual connection. It’s a simple but profound way to show care, understanding, and a sense of belonging. I was touched by this unprepared yet powerful sermon. How about you? Have you ever considered how your quiet and simple touch can be such a powerful but quiet language? Watch for the blind spots. Thanks for your feedback, please like, share and comment. Get a copy of Blind Spots in Relationships. Discover the hidden behavior that could be holding you back from the relationships you desire. http://tinyurl.com/yc3usfsp

Often, my complacency overshadows my pursuit of Mastery. This refers to frequently behaving as if I've reached my peak, forgetting that, like everyone else, I'm on a lifelong journey. I need to remain actively engaged in the essential parts of life to continue my self-improvement. I must keep reading, studying, and staying aware of what I still need to learn and accomplish. Should I depend on my current knowledge and skills, or should I work to improve the talents and understanding that God has given me? My solutions are straightforward: I must work hard and dedicate myself to avoid resting on my laurels and past achievements. Continuous learning is crucial to fulfilling my life's potential. I don't know about you, but for me, it's often easier to watch TV or scroll through my phone or computer for entertainment. However, discipline and following a structured plan are essential for achieving Mastery. Complacency occurs when I become overly satisfied with my achievements and lose the motivation to improve or remain vigilant about potential risks or opportunities. This state can undermine the strong work ethic needed to maintain Mastery. Complacency often results in outdated knowledge and ineffective methods, leading to old-fashioned thinking and approaches in both work and life. Believing that current skills alone will suffice for future success is a serious mistake, especially as work and life constantly evolve. Mastery means not just finishing tasks but doing them with great skill and style that makes one stand out. It involves handling complex tasks efficiently, developing new ideas, quickly adjusting to changes, and always doing high-quality work. Mastery, the ultimate level of skill acquisition, requires continuous effort, perpetual learning, and an unwavering commitment to improvement. Complacency erodes the strong work ethic necessary to excel. It often results in outdated knowledge and ineffective methods. Believing that my skills are sufficient for future success in work and life is a mistake. I make a conscious effort to steer clear of becoming complacent, as it's often the path of least resistance for me. How about you? Are you displaying Mastery or complacency? Watch for the blind spots. Thank you for your feedback. Please like, share and comment. Get a copy of Blind Spots in Relationships. Discover the hidden behavior that could be holding you back from the relationships you desire. http://tinyurl.com/yc3usfsp

Have you ever been excited to share a story, only to wish you could take it back the moment it’s out there? My enthusiasm fades when it seems my story doesn’t match someone else’s. I think it is blurting out a story without considering the other person. Hero stories can inadvertently shut down conversations. It’s almost a reflex to respond with a bigger, better story than the one just told. In personal and professional settings, the desire to be viewed as a “hero” can often provoke a contest of storytelling expertise. I risk harming meaningful communication when I try to surpass others’ stories or accomplishments. This doesn’t just erode the spirit of teamwork; it also diminishes the importance of genuine experiences and ideas, as everyone becomes more focused on outshining one another. Examples: Alice shares her excitement about successfully leading a small project at work. Bob immediately jumps in to talk about the time he led a major company-wide initiative, which drew all the attention and diminished Alice’s sense of accomplishment. Carla mentions her lovely weekend trip to a nearby beach. Derek interjects to describe his month-long trek through Southeast Asia, making Carla’s simple getaway seem trivial and less attractive by comparison. Hero stories, especially those focusing on personal triumphs over others, can stifle genuine dialogue and collaboration. They often shift the focus from understanding and resolving collective issues to proving individual worth through tales of personal conquest. This intrusive style can diminish the contributions of others, breeding resentment and miscommunication among team members. Constant one-upping can lead to a lack of vulnerability within teams. Members feel the need to always appear strong or unbeatable rather than open and collaborative. This environment discourages the sharing of failures and learning experiences that are crucial for group growth and improvement. I sometimes say, “I’m sure others have a better story than mine. However, I’m going to tell it anyway.” If someone jumps in with a hero story, I say, “I prefaced my comment by saying someone may have a better story,” and let it go. How about you? Do you tell hero stories? Watch for the blind spots. Thanks for your feedback. I appreciate your time and please like, share and comment. Get a copy of Blind Spots in Relationships. Discover the hidden behavior that could be holding you back from the relationships you desire. http://tinyurl.com/yc3usfsp

I frequently find myself pondering these questions: What cost did I pay for yesterday? How many days remain for me? Am I making the most of them, or am I squandering them as if I had unlimited time? Am I truly living, or merely existing? Wow, when I think about these questions, I find my thoughts scattered. Sometimes, I feel like I'm making the most of my time, and other times, I feel like I've lost precious moments that I can never get back. What have I achieved, produced, or made happen? Have I used my unique talents to create something only I can create? The hourglass is a timeless symbol of the unrelenting passage of time, it captures our imagination with its simple yet profound design. As sand trickles steadily through the narrow channel, each grain marks a moment passed, irreversible and complete. This elegant timekeeper reminds me that time is finite, urging me to cherish each second. Living, in its truest form, involves a conscious engagement with our lives. It requires an active pursuit of purpose and meaning, not merely an adherence to routines that might feel comfortable but ultimately unfulfilling. Each morning, I wake is an opportunity to ask myself, "Am I living according to my values and aspirations, or am I simply existing within the confines of my circumstances? In the quiet reflection of a day's end, a haunting question emerges: "What price did I pay for yesterday?" It's a contemplative inquiry into the essence of our daily exchanges—time for experience, energy for achievements, emotions for interactions. Yet, deeper than a mere assessment of day-to-day transactions, this question invokes a profound awareness of our mortality. "How many days do I have left?" No one holds the ledger but time itself, and it keeps its secrets well. Every day counts against an unknown total, lending each moment a value that is often realized only in retrospect. In this light, the urgency to ask whether I am using my days to their fullest becomes more moving. Am I merely existing, allowing the days to slip by in a series of forgettable sequences? Or am I truly living, embracing each day as a unique opportunity to experience, learn, and grow? Finding and following a purpose is arguably one of the most challenging yet rewarding endeavors. Purpose drives us, motivates us, and provides a yardstick against which we measure our actions and decisions. It is the compass that guides us through life's complexities and challenges. Without it, we risk drifting aimlessly, caught in the currents of obligation and societal expectation, rather than sailing the course of our own charting. Am I really living, or am I just existing? This question isn't meant to be answered in a day but pondered over a lifetime. Living means making choices that align with who we are and who we hope to be. It means finding joy in the journey, learning from the setbacks, and moving forward with a clearer vision of where we want to go. It requires us to be present in our lives, actively participating rather than passively observing. As we consider the price paid for yesterday and the uncertainty of tomorrow, let us commit to making each day count. Not in the pursuit of perfection, but in the authentic expression of our true selves, crafting a life filled with intention, meaning, and engagement. Yesterday is a ledger where we tally the cost of our choices and actions. Each decision, each moment, carries a price—a subtraction from the finite currency of our days. As we awaken to another dawn, we might ponder: What price did I pay for yesterday? This question beckons us to reflect not only on what we've lost but on what we've gained, and how we choose to use the time that remains. How many days do I have left? This is an unanswerable query that haunts every one of us. The uncertainty of our lifespan can be a source of anxiety or a catalyst for purpose. It underscores the scarcity of our most precious resource: time. Each day slips through our fingers like grains of sand in an hourglass that cannot be turned again. Am I using these days for my best, or am I just using them as if I had an endless supply? Living as though our days are limitless is a common trap. It leads to procrastination, to putting off life changes, and to the comfort of complacency. But recognizing our time as limited can motivate us to live more fully, to prioritize what truly matters, and to discard the trivial and the tedious. Are my daily activities reflecting my deepest values and aspirations? Am I contributing to the world, building relationships, and growing as a person? What is my purpose? This profound question drives at the core of our existence. Finding one’s purpose is not about discovering some grand destiny, but about carving out meaningful pursuit’s day by day. Purpose gives direction and infuses our actions with significance. It transforms mere existence into vibrant living. Am I really living, or am I just existing? To live is to engage actively with life, to savor experiences, to learn and love, to hurt and heal. Existence, in contrast, is passive—a state of survival, devoid of passion or engagement. The difference lies in our choices and our mindset. Reflecting on these questions isn't just philosophical—it's practical. It compels us to make conscious decisions, to prioritize, and to act with intention. Let us then choose to pay the price of a day well-lived, embracing our limited days with the zeal of those who know their true value. How about you? What price did you pay for yesterday? Watch for the blind spots. I appreciate your time and thanks for you feedback, please like, share and comment. Get a copy of Blind Spots in Relationships. Discover the hidden behavior that could be holding you back from the relationships you desire. http://tinyurl.com/yc3usfsp

Too often, when talking to someone, I hold back details about my experiences, which is crucial for them to truly understand and connect with me during our interaction. If I don’t verbally express my thoughts, feelings, or reactions, they may be overlooked or misinterpreted, leading to confusion or misunderstandings in the conversation. Sometimes, I find it easy to withhold information. When I think, “I shouldn’t say this because it might create more problems,” that’s my cue to speak up. I depend on fully understanding the other person during a conversation, and if I’m only privy to part of their thoughts or experiences, it limits me. Poor communication is a significant issue I observe today. Despite having a rich language, it must convey information effectively enough to ensure deep understanding and connection. In communication, non-verbal cues often bridge the gap left by words unspoken. A pause, averted eyes, or a shift in tone can suggest more than what is explicitly stated. Such cues might lead others to assume feelings of disappointment, disapproval, or dissent, even if none was intended. Consequently, the recipient may react based on these assumptions, sparking conflicts that stem from misunderstandings. Silence can be ambiguous, and its interpretation varies widely among different personalities and situations. While it may sometimes be prudent to withhold information due to specific circumstances, holding back can be detrimental in communications where connection is essential. The saying, “It’s not what I say, it’s what I don’t say that causes problems,” is a powerful reminder of the importance of complete and transparent communication. By being aware of the implications of my silence and striving for clarity in my interactions, I can significantly reduce misunderstandings and enhance my personal and professional relationships. The challenge is in choosing the right words and ensuring that my silence doesn’t speak louder than my words. How about you? Are you withholding significant information rather than risking disclosure? Watch for the blind spots. Thanks for your feedback. I appreciate you taking the time to share, like and comment. Get a copy of Blind Spots in Relationships. Discover the hidden behavior that could be holding you back from the relationships you desire. http://tinyurl.com/yc3usfsp

I was talking to a friend the other day, and it seemed the only words they had to say about themselves were stupid, worthless, loser, ugly, and too many more self-beat-up kinds of words. Wow! I can remember the times in my life when I felt similar. Interestingly, these words can still bubble to the surface at times. Self-beat-up can be a mood-changer for me. I love it when life is full of wins. I don’t exhibit bad self-conversation when times are good. If life takes a swing to the negative, then look out. Too often, I feel I let someone down, made a mistake, or failed somehow. This is when I wrap myself in the negative word blanket. Old habits are hard to break, but If I hold on to negative self-talk, I will remain negative, drastically affecting my mood. Hearing negative things as children or being put down or bullied creates the seedbed that spawns these negative comments. Having negativity etched in my mind can be challenging to process healthily. Returning to that old familiar behavior during stress or duress is too easy. Self-criticism chips away at my self-esteem and confidence. It can lead to heightened levels of anxiety and stress as I constantly worry about my perceived shortcomings and failures. Continually telling myself I am not good enough or will fail can create a self-fulfilling prophecy. Engaging in positive self-talk and acknowledging my strengths and accomplishments can boost self-esteem and self-confidence. Self-compassion and understanding can help reduce stress and anxiety by fostering a more balanced and realistic perspective. It can help regulate my emotions more effectively, allowing me to manage stress, anger, and other challenging emotions healthily and constructively. Healthy self-conversation involves kindness, compassion, respect, and cultivating a mindset of self-awareness and self-acceptance. Acknowledging mistakes as opportunities for growth and remembering that we are all works in progress is a great way to overcome self-beat-up. How about you? Are you saying kind or harsh things about yourself? Watch for the blind spots. Thanks for your feedback, I appreciate your perspectives. Please like, share and comment. Get a copy of Blind Spots in Relationships. Discover the hidden behavior that could be holding you back from the relationships you desire. http://tinyurl.com/yc3usfsp

Have you ever noticed the vibrational frequencies or vibes you or others emit? This is a form of communication, where our positive or negative energy frequencies communicate emotions and states of being to others, without words. Have you noticed you can sense someone’s feelings based on the frequency with which they operate? This is not usually conscious but a hidden form of communication. All of us have an energy field. When I walk into a meeting, a family gathering, or my home, I bring and experience an aura around me. Instead of acting on the vibes I desire to experience, I can easily adapt to the vibes I walk into. Good vibes create an environment of joy, peace, relaxation, comfort, and connection. These vibes are easy to meld into. It is the kind of experience where smiles and laughter exist. I call this attractive and desirable. It is a place to look forward to joining, a warm ray of sunshine on a cold, cloudy day where my spirits are lifted regardless of my vibes. Negative vibes evoke discomfort, uneasiness, fear, disconnection, and unhappiness. They produce an aura that is unpleasant, unattractive, and uninviting. They emit tense, gloomy vibes that cause one to want to avoid the experience. Then there are the neutral vibes I experience during peaceful routines or matter-of-fact situations. This is the get-down-to-business aura that neither thwarts nor uplifts my spirits yet can produce calmness and productivity. It is emotionally mature to recognize my vibes and the vibes I enter into. If I can realize my vibes and know which of the categories mentioned above I am operating from, I am equipped to be in charge of myself. Being in charge allows me to survey the vibes I encounter in various settings. I choose to bring good vibes to the party. If I am not in a place to do that, I should announce it and maintain an attractive self. How about you? Do you recognize your vibes and read the vibes of others correctly? Watch for the blind spots. I appreciate your feedback. Please like, share and comment. Get a copy of Blind Spots in Relationships.  Discover the hidden behavior that could be holding you back from the relationships you desire. http://tinyurl.com/yc3usfsp